Confrontations can suddenly erupt!
A person’s body language can often give warning and prepare you for a possible confrontation but always be prepared for the sudden unprovoked attack!
Confrontations even between friends can suddenly erupt over petty
things, basically a different opinion over something can easily trigger this
and if alcohol is involved things could get out of hand pretty
The key is to not allow yourself to get drawn into this type of
situation by remaining calm and by never putting yourself directly in front of
someone who is clearly acting in an aggressive manner and looking for a
confrontation. Keep your distance and hopefully the situation will be defused quickly.
The usual pattern of behavior for this situation to start is by an
exchange of words which can become insulting and threatening, nearly always
accompanied by arm waving and gesturing and even throwing objects that might be
within reach before coming to physical blows.
Different types of confrontations
Here’s the three main types of confrontations you may have seen or
experienced yourself at some time, all are pretty common.
1) An individual who is gesturing for you to
“have a go” from a distance is usually a sign his bark is worse than his bite,
in other words he’s more of an exhibitionist rather than a fighter. Unless you
say something that really hits a nerve making him suddenly attack you he’ll
probably just be satisfied with a barrage of insults then head off to tell his
friends how he won a fight that never even happened! A frustrating situation,
but a far better outcome however than an actual fight. Words can hurt for sure,
but so can getting beaten senseless.
2) Occasionally a confrontation can really
escalate, when someone not only talks bad but actually gets closer to you and
starts pushing and grabbing then this is a very serious threat indeed. Once
this has reached that point it will keep escalating till you either do
something to make him back off or an outside intervention ends the situation,
but at this point simply hoping for the best is not going to help you at all,
the talking stage is well and truly over and it’s now time for action!
3) You might find yourself in a confrontation
with someone who skips all the above and goes straight into violence against
you. At this point anything goes as you have no idea how far your attacker may
take things, he may be satisfied with hitting you a couple of times, but
equally he may be satisfied with knocking you down and kicking you in the head
while you are helpless on the ground. Passersby may decide to join in and help
you, then again they may completely ignore the situation, it can and does
happen. The point is once this has reached the physical level you have no way
to know just how bad it might get, your life may be in danger at this point.
So, to recap here are briefly the three main types of
confrontations we just talked about…
1) Someone who is all talk and has little
intention of actually fighting, you are unlikely to be at too much risk from
this type of individual apart from being called a few bad names.
2) Someone who takes the confrontation to the
next level by pushing and grabbing. You are at possible risk from this type of
individual unless you protect yourself from the possible attack that is very
close to happening.
3) Someone who goes straight into the
violence without any kind of warning, you are at most risk from this type of
individual. You have no time to be on your guard here as you are at severe risk
from an unprovoked attack, the surprise of which can result in serious injury.
Most of the people that like to start fights really have no idea
how to fight in the first place! Many are nothing more than bullies picking a
fight with someone who doesn’t stand much chance of beating them relying on
aggression and intimidation which can work in their favor simply because
untrained people don’t know how to handle those two things and are basically
beaten before a punch is thrown.
Although anything can happen in a fight there’s a definite trend
to what actually does happen, the buildup, such as the posturing and threats is
very common as is the grabbing and pushing. Once the fighting actually starts,
you’ll nearly always see the big overhead swinging punch with the stronger hand
from the person throwing it proving they know nothing about fighting at all!
Also wrestling on the ground is another favorite it seems. Real fights are
certainly nowhere near as exciting or interesting as the ones you see in the
Kung-Fu movies, but of course they are not real.
Don’t react like a victim
Don’t react like a victim. How you react to a potential
confrontation is very important. There is nothing wrong with being polite and
considerate as long as you make it very clear that you are choosing to be civil
rather than being coerced by the aggressor. It is possible to head off many potentially
serious problems by taking a stand early on and making it clear that you have
no intentions of accepting the situation that could develop.
Deterrence. This stand can take one of two forms, which are best
described as deterrence and de-escalation. Deterrence is quite a bold response,
even though it doesn’t have to be aggressive or rude, basically you’re making a
bold statement saying enough is enough! The only problem with this being if
you’re not a match physically for the potential attacker it could be like
waving a red flag to a bull leading to an escalation of the situation.
De-Escalation. This is just the opposite approach, you are trying
to appeal to his good nature, assuming he has one that is. Instead of making a
bold response you try to calm things down or make an excuse for why you are
backing off, this might mean you are apologizing for something you haven’t even
done in the first place! But if it ends the possible threat then take that to
be a victory. De-Escalation can be a good strategy as it allows the potential
attacker to go on his way believing he made you stand down in fear of him.
However, many confrontations are fueled by nothing more than over inflated egos
so this strategy could backfire on you by pushing him down onto a position in
which his ego forces him to attack you. Think wisely before using either of
these two strategies.
Know where an attackers hands are
During a confrontation always make sure you know where your
potential attacker’s hands are at all times, while you can see them the biggest
threat is receiving a punch but when their hands disappear under clothes
there’s a good chance they will produce a weapon such as a knife. If this
happens don’t wait to see what they surprise you with! The moment their hand
goes under clothing act fast! Lunge forward jamming their arm against their
body while delivering a barrage of strikes with your other hand. A knife threat
will be much easier to deal with while it’s still concealed under clothing, but
once drawn and out in the open the danger level has been significantly
If you are facing an attacker who has you at gun point, you are in
a whole new level of danger! No matter how good you are at martial arts you
aren’t going to dodge a bullet! It’s not like in the movies where the hero
avoids the bullets with his lightning fast reflexes, try this in the real world
and you will be seriously injured or killed in seconds!
If you are facing someone at gunpoint, then you are most likely
about to be robbed. Whatever possessions the attacker wants give them up
immediately! Remember, your attacker doesn’t have to be close to you for you to
be hurt with a gun. This isn’t the time to play the hero dodging bullets like
on some movies, doesn’t work that way at all.
Bottom line is this, your life is seriously on the line! No matter
how valuable items may be for the most part they can be replaced. Your life
Have you been the victim of a robbery at gunpoint? Have you experienced any of the confrontations we covered in this story? If so, were you able to defuse the situation with passive gestures or did it escalate to a fight?